Thousands take to the streets protesting at rumors that the universe
is being remade. New Quark's mayor, in a speech to crowds today, says that, "It is only being revamped."
Wanted:
Strong, hard-working, unquestioning, thick-skinned individuals for miscellaneous
otherworldly tasks. No resume or previous experience required. Please apply in person at 323 South Rose St., New
Quark, Sneedle.
Author, Melinda Lewis, today dispelled rumors that the latest in her series
of books, "The Warlock of the Dark Tower," had been cancelled. The new book, "Dragon-Walking For Dummies," is slated
for release later this August.